Fiction Writing's First Rule: Show Don't Tell

Once you have conceived your story idea, you must begin the process of fleshing it out.  And as most creative writing teachers would tell you, while engaging in this process of fleshing out your story you had better show, and not tell.  But what exactly does “show, don’t tell” mean?  This concept is best illustrated through scene or a sense of place.  It’s more than just giving the facts; it’s helping the reader experience the facts through vivid detail and description.

 

Setting the scene is one of the main ways you can show your story rather than just tell it.

Consider the following passage:

I noticed her hair for the first time was not pulled back into a bun like it usually was, but instead was hanging down below her shoulders.  It had been lightly sprinkled with glitter.  She wore a white dress that fit her well and a tad bit of makeup on her face where she wore a slight smile as if she were harboring a secret.  Just what her part required.

Here is how Nicholas Sparks writes it in his novel A Walk to Remember :

For the first time since I’d known her, her honey-colored hair wasn’t pulled into a tight bun. Instead it was hanging loosely, longer than I imagined, reaching below her shoulder blades. There was a trace of glitter in her hair, and it caught the stage lights, sparkling like a crystal halo. Set against her flowing white dress tailored exactly for her, it was absolutely amazing to behold. She didn’t look like the girl I’d grown up with or the girl I’d come recently to know. She wore a touch of makeup, too—not a lot, just enough to bring out the softness of her features.  She was smiling slightly, as if she were holding a secret close to her heart, just like the part called for her to do.

Notice the differences between these two passages.  One is more factual while the other is more descriptive.  The first passage allows the reader to picture the scene, but the second passage allows the reader to experience it. The passage by Sparks is much more descriptive because it includes more detail. Detail is key in separating showing from telling.

Using the active voice also helps with showing.  Make sure that she threw the vase and not that the vase was thrown by her.

  

In addition to using an active voice, showing can also be accomplished by using strong, vivid verbs.  If you find yourself using verbs like was consistently, you might want to ask yourself if a more descriptive verb could be used in its place.  The more specific the verb, the more the reader can accurately picture what is happening. 

 

However you create your scenes, make sure they are showing us your story, not just telling us about it.  Or as Ansen Dibell (Plot) puts it: “Creating scenes means finding ways for your story to show itself, rather than ways for you to tell it.”